The Story of Jessy: A Girl Who Felt Excluded

Jessy was a little blonde girl who had just entered middle school. At eleven and a half years old, she was brought to me by her father, who was worried about her weight gain and constant sadness. Polite and smiling, though a bit shy, she seemed rather normal at first glance: a bit chubby, a bit short for her age, with only the faintest signs of puberty, nothing that appeared overly concerning. Perhaps the parents were unnecessarily anxious, mistaking early signs of adolescence for something more troubling.

I began by inquiring about Jessy’s background, which appeared quite normal: she was the third child, with two older siblings eight and six years older than her, making her the "little one" of the family. The family seemed united, but both parents worked long hours and had significant responsibilities. There were no notable issues during early childhood; the pregnancy and birth were uneventful. The family was well-off, with nothing apparent to explain her weight gain and recent withdrawal.

To start a Psycho-Bio-Acupressure (PBA®) session with a child, I always begin by determining which circuits need immediate rebalancing energetically. Then I check if the child might unknowingly suffer from emotional blockages affecting their behavior and I proceed to remove them.

I followed the usual procedure with Jessy. To my surprise, Jessy was completely energetically disturbed, a condition usually seen only in those with depression. This revealed the enormous capacity children have for masking their true feelings. No one, seeing her speak and smile normally, would have guessed she was depressed.

I applied different acupressure circuits for anger, for negative thinking, for depressive states, for obsessions and overthinking, for anxiety, one to “reset her energy centres, for positive recharging, and finally one to restore energy at the throat, disturbed by unspoken thoughts.

After the application of the 5th circuits of acupressure points, Jessy began to relax, letting out a small sigh and sinking further into the table as her clenched hands relaxed. It was astonishing to see how deeply this seemingly calm and placid girl was deeply disturbed. Her energy systems had switched to extremely harmful patterns.

Thoughts are energy; negative thinking fills us with negative energy, causing our natural resilience to disappear. It’s like a computer; if the voltage drops, it “glitches.” Jessy had so many parasitic energies that her natural self-defense potential was compromised.

This condition doesn’t arise by chance. I couldn’t just balance her energies; I also needed to find and remove any emotional blockages she had created. Without addressing these, she would quickly relapse.

Verbalizing these blockages in front of parents is challenging, as they often feel guilty or responsible and wonder what they did “wrong.” I explain to them that, if you exclude the hours of sleep, their child spends more time outside the home than in it since they started daycare. Yet they still feel guilty about their child's blockages. I often add, in a joking manner, that “even though the Creator is perfect, He still forgot one thing: to attach the instruction manual to the baby's little toe,” which means parents are bound to make mistakes. But there is nothing to be done: when we find blockages in their children, all parents in the world feel guilty or search for the cause of these blockages (which, when using a method like PBA®, is not necessary. My philosophy is that when something is causing a problem, the important thing is to remove it, not spend time, as most psychotherapies do, trying to find out who caused it, especially since, more often than not, the problem still remains).

Verbalizing blockages in front of the parents is not easy; it requires trying to minimize everything, which is quite difficult. Despite this, I always keep one parent in the treatment room with us. This helps prevent children from later inventing blockages that were not found or, worse, making false accusations against their parents due to an overly imaginative or manipulative behavior they might adopt.

In this case, Jessy’s father seemed uncomfortable. When I explained that I couldn’t just balance her energies but needed to address emotional blockages, he offered to wait in the waiting area. Jessy had no objections, so I agreed.

Despite her young age, Jessy could articulate her distress well. Once her father left, she quickly shared her problems: feeling rejected by her friends, losing her joy for life, and disliking her body. I explained in simple terms that she might have emotional blockages making her feel this way, but they had nothing to do with her true self. And if I managed to find them, the simple fact that we talked about them together would allow her brain to release them, and they would no longer trouble her. But most importantly, whatever I found, she should not try to understand why or how they were formed.

Jessy understood quickly, and we began identifying her blockages. The first was the wound of rejection, leading to this conversation:

-Me - “Have you ever felt rejected?”

-Jessy - “All the time.”

-Me - “Well, if I sense this, it’s because it’s a blockage; it’s not your true nature. If it were part of your character, I wouldn’t be able to find it. I can only find what isn’t you; do you understand?”

As I spoke, I reapplied the anxiety circuit, as mentioning a significant blockage often triggers anxiety. I continued:

-Me - “There was a moment when you felt rejected. Don’t try to remember when it was, perhaps at daycare or when your mom was too busy. It doesn’t matter. The important thing is that this blockage is leaving, and in the future, you won’t feel excluded without reason.”

Jessy grasped that these blockages were not her identity and that their removal would allow her to rediscover her true self and joy for life.

We discovered another blockage: the feeling of not being listened to by others. This made her feel ignored and could eventually lead to her not speaking up, which explained the need for the circuit for unexpressed feelings that I had applied to her earlier. I reassured her that she would no longer feel this way, as the blockage was now gone.

Then, a very common blockage surfaced: the love I didn't receive from my mother. Everything being subjective, she ended up with this impression, likely mistakenly, simply from her mother’s busy work schedule. As you must know by now, because your prefrontal cortex does not develop until 10-12 years of age, children don’t have the ability to put things into perspective and they take everything at a face value.

I explained that these blockages make even minor wounds hurt deeply.

Jessy had many blockages: fear of displeasing others, which could lead her to overly monitor herself and prevent her from being spontaneous. A guilt of not being good enough, which prevented her from valuing herself properly. As I explained to her, we are bound to act according to the self-esteem we possess.

The panic of being abandoned and the fear of losing loved ones likely caused her to be unconsciously possessive, potentially suffocating her friends and possibly explaining their rejection of her.

I also found a blockage preventing her from expressing emotions. As I explained to her, it was fortunate that I found it, because since it was a blockage, it was not part of her character. This meant she would be able to start expressing herself again. (I always explain to people that I do not have access to their nature or character, that PBA is not intrusive, and that I can only access what prevents them from being themselves.)

She faced a multitude of issues, including a lack of spontaneity, a constant belief that she displeased others, a fear of judgments and criticisms, a terror of being laughed at, and anxiety about what others might say or think of her, all hindering her from making friends.

It’s important to understand that there is always a logic behind emotional blockages; one blockage often leads to another, creating a chain from which one becomes completely trapped. With such a series of blockages, it was clear that Jessy couldn’t be relaxed and open in her relationships: she was, in fact, unable to make friends. My goal was to explain this to her gradually so she would understand that this behavior, although familiar, had nothing to do with her true nature or real character, and that things would soon change.

I could sense her becoming more and more relaxed and reassured. Overall, the session went well.

There was still the issue of her lack of self-love and refusal to accept her appearance. “If you don’t love your body,” I told her, “it will reflect that back to you.”

Then we finally addressed the systems of protection and defense. These are blockages through which our brain erroneously thinks it is alerting or protecting us - what the Tibetans refer to as "illness being a letter the body sends us." In Jessy’s case, it was no surprise to find that weight gain was associated with both of these blockages.

As I explained to her, our ancestors' greatest fear was famine. This fear is still ingrained in our primitive brain. So, when our brain detects a signal of fear, it doesn’t analyze the cause; it simply says, "There’s a risk of famine, we need to store up." This leads to an excessive craving for sweets and snacking. However, if we decide to go on a diet, the reptilian brain responds with, "Here comes the famine, let’s store even more," which explains why most diets are ineffective...

We had reached the end of the session. We had addressed most of the blockages affecting Jessy, which made her distrustful, withdrawn, unloved, unattractive, isolated and excluded. These issues had taken away her joy of living.

In just one session, she was able to understand why she reacted the way she did. But more importantly, she realized that none of this was her true nature, that none of this was who she really was, and that everything was about to change. She also understood that she was neither responsible nor guilty for this behavior.

She got up, smiling.

When her father, who had been waiting in the waiting room, saw her, he couldn’t help but exclaim, “My daughter, you look like a different person!”

Three months later, I heard that Jessy had lost weight, rejoined a group of friends, and regained her joy for life. One PBA® session had been enough. Children seem to respond even better than adults to PBA®.

Imagine her adult life if she hadn’t received help at eleven and a half. She would have lived with feelings of rejection, fear of judgment, and self-loathing, mistaking these blockages for character traits. Instead, one hour freed her from them.

The book: "5 Points for My Child"

Author Dr. Pierre-Noël Delatte – Éditeur Guy Trédaniel. – p23.